To be a man is to be Father
The day’s trials come like wind. Temptations like a tornado. Problems were like a whirlwind as fear became as wide as an ocean. The journey was like climbing a mountain and deep inside I felt as hollow as a cave. Sufferings came in a blizzard as emotions piled up like an iceberg. Friends disappeared like summer rain while hope fell down like autumn leaves.
My life froze up like snow and pain burnt like the Sahara Desert. A smile seemed as far as the horizon. You should have been there from the start, more than my best friend. Your hand should have kept and held me. My father’s love: a burner that should have been there in the middle of the night.
He left before I even knew him, so many things I would have wanted to learn from a father’s perspective but he took that away. If you have the energy to sire a child, then you should be able to stick around and watch that child grow. It doesn’t matter if you are not on speaking terms with the mother, the child should not come between the problems that you two are having.
To be a man, is to be a Father when Nature, a Child and God calls you to be.
To be a man is to love a Woman
Knowing that you as the man has the responsibility to take care of your woman in all aspects. Be the protector and not just stand by as she is being abused in your presence. Let her know that your support is unconditional and forever as long as you two are together.
All she wants is to be held, to feel her man’s special warmth. Dreams cannot convey the feelings she wants. Shower in the certainty of what dreams are made of. She wants to experience her man’s heart.
Being a man is collapsing onto your girl’s hands and bearing your vulnerable soul to her knowing that the moment is only for the two of you. Letting her be strong for you when you cry and hold you close when your ego crumbles.
To be a man is to be a protector. But you can always jump on top of her coffee table when you see a cockroach scruff ling across the floor instead of squashing it. Then explain later that you would protect her better with both of you on top.
It is knowing that she will sometimes make you regret but you will forget because you love her. That sometimes you will make her cry but she will forgive you because she cares about you. Remembering that sometimes you made her angry but she assumed because she understood.
On good days you will make her smile and she will thank God because of you and that sometimes she made you curse but you took it back because you regretted.
Also knowing that sometimes you will fail her and she will fail you but you will understand that you can never give up because you believe in the two of you.
To be a man is to be a true Friend
Lending money to your jamaa (best buddy) that you know will never pay you back even if hell freezes over. Thumping your chest in a war like manner, then bumping into your friend as you celebrate your favorite team’s championship win. Afterwards you console your other friend whose team lost to yours with a beer or two.
It is spotting a rugged manly beard or a goatee and refusing to shave just to prove a point to your buddies who dared you just for the heck of it.
It is pretending not to cry in front of your boys after you’re “the one” turned down your proposal and even poured on you that very expensive wine just for good measure.
Even though you know she was right that you are always giving in to your mother’s demands and even secretly enjoy being Mama’s little boy-at 35 years! After all your boys always tell you to abide by the principle of DENY.DENY.DENY.
To be a man is not standing by as you watch your friend drink himself to death, or encouraging and/ or turning a blind eye when you know he is cheating on their spouse/girlfriend.
Being a man is tough but if you get your act together and know how to maneuver every role that is thrown at you, then you are halfway there. Just take responsibility, accept help sometimes and be loyal to those around you. It tends to work out well for you in the end.
Being a man is knowing when to be what, at what time, with whom and for what purpose…But what do I know…I am just a woman!
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