Two Months to my birthday

not_so_happy_birthday_by_rawxden

My birthday is in May and I kind of dread getting there. I mean aren’t you  supposed to be jumping up and down with excitement because you are adding another year? Well i feel like crap because It just reminds me of the things I have not done. Where I wanted to be I am not even there yet. Seems like a long while before I get to that place where I will accept that life has to move on.
The worst part is that I have no job and it feels like I am going nowhere with this.How can one just loose everything at one time. I had plans of how this year would end. I had plans to buy my fridge, a new phone and even a gas cooker because I needed a kitchen of my own. Don’t get me wrong, living in my current bed seater was not that bad. I just needed my own kitchen! Is that too much for a girl to want?
Speaking of Bed seater’s, I wont even be living in it anymore. Since i lost my job, i have to move in with my cousin. See why I’m not looking forward to my birthday.
But I would rather go move in with my cousin than go back home. I just feel like I would be going backwards instead of moving on ahead. It’s crazy, i never imagined I would be back to searching for a job after hustling for this one I had. A chick cannot even catch a break! I feel like I ‘m just muddling in this planet without knowing where I am headed to.How am I going to face myself when my birthday comes along and am stuck in this bullet hole.
I probably should not give up yet because i have several week…a month plus to get to my birthday so you never know what might happen between to day and come may. Damn, it will be exactly two moths since today is 18th March and my birthday is on 18th May. Well how do you know, I decided to vent out and the dates I’m venting out and my birthday are the same. Maybe this means something, that by that day I will be writing something exciting or different that will have happened.
So i rest my case and wait to see what my future has in store for my little self. Who knows something epic will take place and you’ll be the first to know. Fingers and toes crossed!!!

Live in Burgundy Moments
Mulunga

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